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The Religious Component of Psychosis 

When I was deep in the midst of a psychotic break, I was convinced that I was a prophet sent from God to save society from its ills. Many people I’ve spoken to about schizophrenia experience similar beliefs. When psychosis hits, there is often a function of thinking that you have been ordained with supernatural authority. Some people think they are Jesus or God himself and many others are convinced that they hear the voice of God. It’s easy to see why religion seems to take such a central hold in times of psychosis. Psychosis, in and of itself, is a kind of supernatural experience. Religious texts are filled with myths, stories, and folklore about people who communicate with God. The symptoms themselves, which seem to suggest that there’s something otherworldly occurring, through either a perceived telepathy or delusions of grandeur, make it easy to conclude that you are connected to something divine.  (more…)

Persistence of Schizophrenic Delusions

Schizophrenia is an insidious disease. It can be difficult to parse even the clearest facets of reality from the delusions in your head. The delusions you have can wreak havoc on your concept of the real world, of relationships and your idea of well being. Schizophrenic delusions are persistent, which is one of the major reasons recovery can take such a long time.  (more…)

Why Mental Health Recovery Can Take Years

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I get messages from people all the time about my work. Many times, they’re looking for advice on how to help a loved one with mental illness. Sometimes I feel that, through me, they are trying to find some magic cure that can help immediately. The only advice I give is to be there and, above all else, give it time. That can be hard to come to terms with when your world seems so chaotic, but time is truly the only thing that can heal in situations like these.  (more…)

Delusions Of Grandeur With Schizophrenia

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The belief that you are somehow more powerful or more important than you are, or perhaps anybody is, is a serious and sometimes dangerous misperception. When I went on my trip to the U.N. in the midst of serious psychosis I believed, though I was still resistant, that I was a prophet sent by God to bring peace to the world. I had a philosophy of light balancing out dark, good balancing evil and opposite extremes cooperating to form a cohesive whole. I was unclear then on how exactly this partial philosophy would bring peace to the world and now, ten years out, I’m even more confused by it.  (more…)

Schizophrenia & Talking To God

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There are nights where I lie in bed, staring up at the ceiling and I ask for help. Sometimes the voice comes; sometimes it doesn’t but, in the times where it does, it gives me the reassurance that I need to, at the very least, make it through the night, and then to keep going the next morning. I talked, in my previous essay, about the mysterious voices in my head and the God voice is one of the two distinct voices I hear. The other is some kind of demon that I’ve talked at length about in my other writings, but the voice of God, as omnipotent and wise as it is, is still a symptom of my psychosis.  (more…)